Greetings star shine... the earth says hello.. Lol wth? what's wt the Charlie n the Choc Factory imitation? regardless the fact that Johnny Depp was recently available and unavailable himself a week later, millions of crazy things had happen since my last post. Which was posted a day after my birthday which was also my bestfriend's birthday. Gosh i miss her... >.< Nevertheless, that is not what i intend to tell you guys.. wait, wait... before that, i owe u guys an apology first of all, I am really, really sorry for not updating as often I should or could. But i was caught with assignments and final assessments before my final exam. so recap of life from MAY to AUG? omg... hv 2 recap wat happened? my gosh... that would be painfully long... really but then again it's ok since after this i may not be able to post as often as i'd like it to be. because.... ok ok chill Farce, u need 2 tell these people what have u been up to for the past 4 months slowly... fuh.... *inhale, *exhale... so? MAY?
Early May to Early June...
Well after my last post, basically life was about FINAL ASSIGNMENT, ASSESSMENTS, and PREPARATION TO FINALS.. oh and... coping with the LOSS... as 2 of my post b4 bout me losing my friends... yeah that one.. well basically coping.. after finals ended, i stayed in my hostel for a little bit longer cuz i was job hunting. but sad thing is, after so many (ceh so many konon... just 2) shops we (Sarah ~a friend~ and me) went to send in our application form, and not to forget calls made to ask about the job offer. Needless to say, it was a fail attempt since just a week staying longer then i should i was SUMMONED back by my aunt... hate to displease them, I went back. Hmm... what else? ah yes.. MUFY result came out... it was better this time around but not good enough to let me enter monash... i was lacking of 7 marks... translated to 2 semester? 14 marks.. how to get? die...
Ok so I am lacking of 14=7marks to get into monash. I almost took MUFY sem 3. Then on one desperate Sunday, i just prayed in church and made a vow. i'd quit Facebook and cut my long perfectly nurtured nails if i got into Monash. and i did!! YAY! thank God for monash came through... i got a single unit enrolment non-awards program. this program is like a conditional offer... if i hit 70 for all my units, then only i be able to continue into MONASH 2nd sem. >.< so now i am facebook-less and my nails are super short... on the first week i felt like my hand shrunk... bt i gt to admit it was easier to text these days. oh we are straying to the future... ok what else happend in this time frame? hmm.. yes how can i forget... THEY came back to me... simultaneously parallel... some thing in between them happened, something i still cannot wrap my head nor my fingers around it... an argument in my POV can be fixed with one very rational heart to heart conversation. no anger no tears... just clear calm head and moderate breathing conversation. of course i dont want to be there. i meant as much as i want to know what they are talking about and make sure one does not get mean to the other, i know my presence will NOT do either of them any good and mostly not gonna do me any good. anyways since then i have been talking to them again after 3 months of these 2 people missing from my life. Honestly I never really moved on from hoping that one day they would be my friends again but I was coping a life without them in it. Since i lived the past 3 months coping with the thought that they will never come back, they are happier without me anyways, always wishing that they would come back, and when they finally came back simultaneously parallel, I guess the quote "Be careful with what you wish for, cz you might just get it" applies. I never thought i'd actually say this but when they came back, the sense of calmness, odd normality, gone. They come and go and back like a whirlwind. They always bring this heavy overbearing emotions. if i were a normal person, i'd plunge into a minor depression as they really do bring some what negative energy with them. it took me that 3 months to regain all those bubbly positive energy i had before i took them into my life. now that they are back, these energy i am trying to regain is running out again... seriously i could have just shoo BOTH of them away and say "My life was perf wt out u b4 n u had to come and ruin it. i gave my all in our friendship, my trust, my heart, my soul but you just toss it away because of that one mistake i did. and now you come running back at me and expect me to forgive you? F*ck Off!" i could have said that to both of them. but of course i didnt. i can never say that to them. ever. its the love and care i had for them that prevented me from doing so. i cried. yes i cried again after 3months. my question were why now? why me? why when i am on the verge of coping and moving on and you just have to look for me? the heartache hurts... it's like some one squeezed my heart, it's like some one sat on my chest. it really hurts. but i forgive anyway.. and of course, being FARCELLA SERENITY MARCELLUS LAINON JOHN JOU MOTINJUN, I NEVER forget. and after returning to a constant talking basis with them i felt my own coldness towards them. i am more reserve. i held my self back... i didnt want to believe that they are really back. i even have this thought that beyond my knowledge where I wasnt looking, wasnt listening, walking around off guarded, these 2 supposedly separated people who one of them cant stand the sight of the other without feeling repulse would whisper behind me and say "wow look how we fooled her.. she's the joke here.. such a bitch she rejoice upon other people's heartbreak.." first of all i dont rejoice upon them breaking up... it broke my heart when these 2 very close people who have taken each other as brothers break up just like that with no trace or hope of reconciliation anyways that what happened from mid june to part of mid july.
Part of Mid July up till NOW...
ok where to begin again? ok i'll do this as short and as quick as painless as possible.. so bear with me... I got in to monash... as mentioned more then twice. so 16.7.2012? back to school... orientation day, the same day Ronn got his tattoo at my uncle's shop same day one of my relative in sabah passed away the same day i went shopping with Wilson to turn a one kind-of-a-dull dress to an awesome look for ME for grad nite, the same day i stayed over as in sleep over Wilson's house for the first time... it was one crazy tiring day bt it was worth it... anyways, since then, i have a constant visit at his place for that one week of orientation week. and OMG he is a LOG... So hard to wake him up... i wake up at 7, bathe, get dress, clean my things to be brought back to my hostel and at 8 i'll start to wake him up till 8.30 then he finally decide to wake up... him bathing is approximately 15-30 minutes... what he do? SINGING... really? and to top it all off, class starts at 9.45 @_@ hmm... what else? well i joined MUSA Activity Committee Department and now being apart of the organizing team for MAB (Monash Annual Ball) then i joined MONGA as well... i hope i get in... Into MONGA i meant... >.< well besides joining 2 clubs and society, and juggling clubs duty and assignments and test, nothing much happens... after grad nite few more visit to Wilson's house then life started to be super busy where i dont even have time for my self.. like seriously.. I wanted to watch Ice Age 4 but cant as I was SUPER busy... You know there are so many things i want to say upon starting this entry but after a certain time pausing, I have forgotten most of what i wanted to list down... anyways, this is it for now... i'll put in 3 more within this weekend... =)
Take care.
Love,
Farcella <3 p="p">
